As the days go by I feel anxiety shining through a bit. Poking and prodding, trying to get me to think of the “what if- .”
I am torn because part of me wants to avoid talking about this pandemic, quarantine, toilet paper, hand sanitizer, ... and just go about business as usual (virtually) and because, like me, i'm sure you're overwhelmed with emails with the subject reading "x company during COVID-19."
The thing is, time moves swiftly & this shall pass so It’s good to write in the moment about seasons in history that we live through, so when we look back, all of our feelings and thoughts and emotions are raw and real. With that being said, I might as well get it out while it's fresh on my mind.
While i'm using this time to slow down, trying to de-program the part of myself that has become a diehard cult follower to my master... productivity, and teach myself how to take it day by day, allowing for anything to arise within me, I still do find the weight of this all creeping in.
Our business relies heavily on wholesale (other small businesses purchasing our products to use/sell or retailers purchasing our products) and events at the farm that bring people and community together. Something I've put so much focus on, poured hours and hours into but with these pretty much at a halt…. it's time to get creative!!
In a beautiful quick catch up I had with the lovely Flower Mama, one of my fave local small business owners (6 long feet away.) This weird time we’re living in got brought up as we air hugged and we chatted about some opportunities and takeaways - how to revel in the slowness, enjoy the gift the universe has bestowed upon us, etc. (This of course is a privilege that I know many don’t have. So let’s all take moments here and for forever to appreciate those hustling paycheck to paycheck, or people who can’t work remotely) So the stillness, the slow, it’s a learning opportunity and i’ll dive deeper into that as the week(s) progresses but what anxiety tells me is… “but it’s not sustainable!!!”
Long term it’s definitely not (unless there was a massive paradigm shift in our societal values or a few celebrities begin to endorse us) for now taking it day by day has been working but at some point, if we haven’t already, small businesses may need to rethink their entire business models. Ignore my inner monologue because the conversation was positive and uplifting and it was so refreshing to talk through some of these thoughts with someone who just "gets it."
Since then the days have been filled with me trying to stick to structure around work I've created for myself. Outside of that I have slept, re-arranged furniture, gardened (& chased away little squirrel garden thieves), organized, hopped on my bike, read, and have just given myself time for true inward reflection.
I am so ready and so eager to find solutions to make this business stay afloat and still contribute to my community alllllll with extra intention that the stillness brings. And carry over what I am learning now to when "the back to normal” is here.
Now that I got my worries out, I'd like to focus on the amazing things I have learned during this time! I'll be sharing them bit by bit and I'd love to hear your thoughts and takeaways!
So please feel free to reach out to me on here, any social media or even shoot me an email! Your stresses and worries do not scare me and I also want to hear about all the good things and positivity this time is bringing to your life as well.